struggle,struggle jab!

So i've been really struggling with posting a new blog nothing has crossed my mind at least of any significance for days! (hence the first struggle in my title). So i decided to just talk about my week a little bit. My school books finally came on monday? or tuesday? (you'd think it would be engraved in my brain since i've been waiting so long). Well here's the story, i started online school at the beginning of my junior year i guess because i wanted to finish early, Leetonia was a struggle (hence the second struggle,crap i'm running out of struggles) mainly because i can't shut up and the staff there is just ridiculous...so then began my online journey. It was ok at first, the courses seemed extremely hard and my family and i didn't know anything about choosing schools,but i got through it, so skip a year or so then we found out that the state had a free program big difference from paying a thousand dollars a year!! (Those explanation points are out of anger) To make this long story short there were continued arguments with Leetonia over receiving my transcripts,etc.,etc. and now I finally started this week with my new school...this week...this week!!!(also angry explanation points). But i have been working really hard and with three days into it i have almost 4 weeks completed now. I couldn't have done any of this without the love and support of Andrew,all the prayer and of the on and off help of my family. I'll be finsihed soon and i cannot wait to take that load off my back,thanks to it(the load) i have major back problems,a back like an 80 year old.But anyway that was the beginning of my week and to end it i had some more bank teller problemsSAM I APOLIGIZE NOW ..a few weeks ago i had some problems with Famers Bank,(the ladies were just rude and were always trying to get me to sign up for stuff)my loyal bank for three years. So i decided to close my account there out of annoyance (maybe my patience isn't the best it could be) and switch to National City and yesterday i went to cash a five dollar check i had gotten from my mom because i needed gas (i'm poor and i'm proud). So i arrived there yesterday and went to the door to discover the lobby was closed for no apparent reason, i was there at a decent time in the middle of the banks hours, annyway i reallllly needed some gas, i was lucky i made it through the drive thru. The line of course was huge, that didn't bother me, except for the fact that i could hear my gas tank getting ready to bubble forcing my car to turn off, which it didn't but it was getting closer. I sent through my 5 dollar check after some trouble with the "tube", i was pushing on it because i didn't realize it was automatic plainly stupid, and my fault but the teller continued to stare rudely at me not letting me know that the tube in fact, was automatic. Then i forgot to send through my account number or social security # but instead of asking me to send it through she rudely asked me for my social security # i had to repeat it several times because she wasn't writing it down and the man in the next lane was looking at me and listening! So i continued, and fought for my 5 dollars and finally got it and was so frustrated and annoyed, that i completely forgot to get gas i drove all the way home made it and have yet to go to the gas station.I forgot because i was screaming in my car that "i hate bank people" as i was screaming i decided to change my sentence and started screaming "No i hate all people" I truly don't hate ANYONE and i don't hate bankers at all. Granted most all of this was my complete fault but she didn't handle it right and that's what was so annoying to me. So i've decided i'm not too fond of banks as a whole(sam i love ya, no offense your amazing at your job) maybe it's me, but i'm still too frustrated to make a statement thats logical so i'll stick with it being the teller's fault and problem, maybe she was having a bad day and maybe i could have been nicer but i'm not an overly nice person i'm just a normally polite person a direct quote from andrew which by the way i'm pretty sure that teller is Andrews lover and i'm the girlfriend on the side.
Sorry i tend to ramble and usually end up with a huge run on sentence
Maybe next time i'll be more mature and admit to it being my fault but for now this makes me feel a lot better.
Hence the jab,(this entire last story)

i've been tagged!

3 Things That...
Scare me...the dark(yes i am 18), i guess just basically the unknown to sum it up,and being a lonely old person
People who make me laugh....Laura Shirey,Andrew,and my grandpa Mickey(not because he has funny jokes but just everything he does is hilarious.
I Love....Andrew,my amazing friends,and my Family
I Hate....Fake people,ridiculously rude people,and cocky sons of guns
I don't understand....My sister,my parents intentions,and God(in a good way)
On my desk...uh i don't have a desk but right now i'm sitting near a desk and theres scissors,coffee and paperclips(the essenstials of course)
What i'm doing right now......cutting out papers for the annual Dutch Village Inn christmas partttaayy
What i want to do before i die....travel the world possibly by backpack or just a sreies of roadtrips would be fun,be succesful in all aspects financially,emotionally,and physically,and get back to me on the third..
I can do well...talk to people,listen,and love
Always listen to....old people,your parents and really really smart peeps
Never listen to.....your parents(sometimes i feel like i'm the parent),the devil he's evil
I'd like to learn to ...be trilingual(japanese,french,and spanish)no reason i just think it would be awwwesome, be an amazing makeup artist,and to love everyone
Favorite foods....chinese food,mexican,and good ol' french fries
Shows i watched as a little guy.....i have an awful memory uhhhmmm..oh yeah ninja turtles was my favorite,thats all i can think of

I shed a tear?

As i researched the hanging of Saddam Hussein earlier this afternoon out of curiosity..(i avoided the whole thing up until earlier)I actually became overwhelmed as i watched the moments leading up to his death, with the thought of this man being hated by thousands, not at all that i sympathize with him, but to see someone so dark and so cold-hearted it actually broke my heart.I'm still trying to figure out what possesed him to behave in such a way that thousands were celebrating his death. I can't even begin to fathom the whole situation,i believe he deserved his punishment in every single way and also feel (although i didn't know him personally)he'll be paying for it for eternity.It still breaks my heart to think that someone did such an awful thing or series of things that we had no other choice but to destroy him. I'm also torn up for all the non-believers who are mad at God right now questioning him on how he could do such a "hateful" thing, but to all those, i believe there is a God and his heart is breaking just as much to know he handed over the controls to his child and he set it in motion..the wrong motion, but i'm also glad to learn from this and make a a baby step difference although it will be a small light it will still shine through the darkness,we need to stand up and be the change not just sit around and wait for it to happen....